I'm not gonna lie, I didn't finish this

I couldn't. I truly despise being told by a man what is liberating for me as a woman. I saw what I could finish as less a critique of BDSM and more a list of things the author does and does not like about hearing about BDSM. While that may be a critique it is not a very rigorous one, nor particularly helpful to discussion. In addition I read quite a lot of assuming about who is doing the dominating and the submitting in BDSM sex. The assumption seems to be that it is hetero-pair sex where the woman is dominated and the man is dominate. And/or the more problematic assumption that whomever is dominated is the woman, regardless of gender-identity. I don't see this as much of a feminist critique.

The only other thing I have to add to this critique is this: you don't have to understand how BDSM might be sexually liberating for other people. Ahem, different strokes dude. People have different paths to liberation. Some anarchists call this a diversity of tactics. Your lack of understanding and fear doesn't make the practice bad, it makes it not right for you. So instead of telling us - especially those of us who aren't like you - what is a healthy way is for us, just don't engage in it and tell people when you are uncomfortable hearing about it.


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